Toast Crumbs

I want it to be a metaphor for something, but it isn’t. I just spilled toast crumbs on myself and am trying to decide what to do with the later afternoon. I was invited to a beach. I should go, I really want to go. Another part of me says there is work to be done and it needs to be done on time and on target so I should stay and do that. I’m not a workaholic, I’d rather play any day and if work involves or feels like play so much the better. I think that is why I love working in film. Being creative always feels like play, even when it is hard and exhausting work. Being able to use your imagination every day is awesome, as well as the practical part obviously. Someone has to do the practical things to make the fun happen. Such is life.

This month has been so busy, trying to get TAA done, forgetting what day of the week it is, staffing the school, teaching on the school, arranging being the driver to church, driving in a strange land (aka I don’t “know” the area like I do back home). Actually I love driving. I forgot how much I loved driving. The whole knowing but not overly familiar with how to get places is quite fun really. It’s an adventure when I get to drive. We always get where we need to and in one piece.

It’s warming up here. I’m actually in shorts more days than not this last week or so. It’s not even Australian hot yet.

I’m trying to think of things to say, but it’s just so crazy I’ve forgotten a lot of what has happened in the last few weeks. Charis got her visa, yay! There was movie trivia butt kicking happening. Pretty much, yeah I don’t remember. When Todd Ewen died last week (which was devastating, I admit it; he was always a good guy but I am trying to remember the guy I knew not how he died) I googled more about brain trauma and injuries and what CTE is and some of the concussion symptoms/long term issues. Scary stuff. I don’t even know how many concussions I’ve had (I have a thick skull and solid bones, it takes a lot to injure me and for me to notice it) or the general rattling around of my brain that hasn’t given me a concussion. All I know is the last one was the end of carelessness with my head. I act like a big sissy about it now because I do not want to make things worse than they already are. Especially when I do bump my head and have a set back, which fortunately hasn’t happened in nearly 2 months, it’s scary and because people can’t see the insides of your head they don’t notice that you are having more trouble and expect you to be fine, even when you aren’t. I need to research this more. If there is any correlation between head injuries and metal health I want to know all I can because maybe it will answer some of my questions. If it isn’t from head injuries then what can we do to prevent and help those who have the head injuries and CTE. I could go on about this all day really.

So yeah, that has been my thoughts over the last week. I am making progress on TAA, which has been hard not because I can’t do it but because of focusing issues etc. It really hurts the head in more ways than just learning and brain expanding. It will be done and it will be successful.

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